Pour Into People to Get Results

I recently spoke with a business owner acquaintance who’s been frustrated with her team for some time. “My competitors are catching up, and we lack a sense of urgency and initiative,” she said.

I wondered how it was possible that all her people lacked drive. She’s been in business for over 15 years and has a staff of 75. Could it really be that she hadn’t come across a single talented individual?

After some digging, she admitted that she was likely the cause of the underperformance.

I told her how my father’s high expectations held me back until I developed the awareness to break free from the resulting perfectionism. Turns out she had a similar father—and was now passing on those same unrealistic expectations to her team.

The Myth of Self-Motivated Hires

Here’s what I see happen all the time:

A business owner looks for people just like them and expects them to be driven the same way.

Occasionally, that works.

• Sandy Weill, the former CEO of Citibank, hired a young Jamie Dimon after being pushed out by American Express. Together, they built another empire.
• Similarly, Tim Cook was able to deliver on Steve Jobs’ sky-high expectations at Apple.

But these are rare exceptions. Most people you’ll hire in a small to mid-sized business will be less resilient. (If they weren’t, they’d probably start their own companies.)

Your Real Job: Build Them Up

So your job is to build them up—to mentor them and express confidence that they can do great things.

And unless you were lucky to have had a great mentor yourself, you may not know how to do that.

This is your opportunity, because most people are performing way below their potential. They may have a 6-liter engine stuck in second gear. Your job is to help them shift into third, fourth, and fifth.

The vast majority of people want to be successful—they just don’t know how to get there. Building a structure for regular check-ins using the Mentor Meeting Model™ can give you a consistent way to encourage, guide, and unlock higher performance without relying on hope or frustration.

Understand What Really Drives People

What we often call “drive” is linked to the ego.

Many of us are motivated by a healthy ego and personal pride to perform at a high level.

But guess what: the ego is like any organism—its top priority is to preserve itself and avoid being crushed by criticism.

If you hurt the egos around you, you might be disabling some of your highest-potential people from performing.

How to Lead with Mentorship and Empathy

• Hide your frustration. You want your A-players to feel safe—not judged—when they step out of their comfort zones and fail.
• Catch them doing things right.
• Judge them by their effort and improvement—not your standards.
• Praise twice as often as you offer constructive feedback, and share it with empathy.

Remember: honesty without empathy is brutality.

Be the Mentor You Always Wanted

Be the mentor you always wanted. Pour into your people. Build their self-esteem and give them a reputation to live up to. And if you haven’t already, read—or re-read—Dale Carnegie’s classic: How to Win Friends and Influence People.